"Dadisms"

Showing posts with label Flight. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Flight. Show all posts

Thursday, October 9, 2014

Home Is Where The Hangover Is....

I had a great post written for this trip but I accidentally deleted it on the flight back to Gulfport. I could try and re-write it but I really doubt any effort to resurrect it would be worth your time in reading so I'm going to give you a bunch of photos and captions and hopefully the story will develop organically from there. Like a real life cartoon strip.

Last weekend we flew home for our friends Lord Lady Socks and Betty's wedding. It was definitely worth the trip.

 When your flight is delayed at 6 am on the tarmac due to weather (note the rain in the window) this is the best way to keep your kids calm. Only the most well behaved children and the most Saintly patient parents  can fly without some form of audio visual stimulation for their kids. Obviously ours are not the most well behaved...yet... and we absolutely do not have the level of calm required at times like this.


After having our dear friend Jamie pick us up in Baltimore we dropped the girls off with Grandma (my mother) and went to York to my Dad's house. I got in some guy time with the boys. Mrs. Standby got to drink with the girls. The evening eventually degraded into a bit too much Scotch and a dare that lead to me and another poor soul eating these Ghost Peppers. 
Look, I ate one. I thought I could probably die, I considered calling 911. At one point I hoped the pain would cause me to pass out. People... don't do this unless you really want to know God's creative genius. These peppers....just don't.



The next morning we got up...a bit floggy from the nights bad decisions and drove down to the wedding. Let me just say we've done a lot of weddings this year. This place wins the award for best wedding venue. A beautiful family farm in Montgomery County. The property is huge and stunning... and rumor has it that it might be for sale in the near future (in case anyone wants to go in on it with us). It was amazing getting see old friends, I love these guys dearly.



Face it, if you invite us to your wedding you will be guaranteed a few things...
   -we will look good
   -we will dance shamelessly
   -we will drink as much of your open bar  as we possibly can
   -we will pass out before the after party
   - we will be at the family brunch, because we love brunch

The lovely couple cutting the cake. I would like to add, I am a man, I am quite confident in my hetero-sexuality so I can say "Betty your dress was amazing! You rocked it girl."  Sadly,  I never had any cake, we were too busy dancing. Besides I'm pretty sure I saw Charlie (one of the absolutely adorable kids at the party) lick the icing off the bottom. BUT the food truck was a pretty baller move!


When it gets cold, grab your lady, take her scarf, wrap it on your head and take a nap.- Boson's words of wisdom ( eventually this will be a Dadism, I'm sure)






The morning after in the boudoir, feeling a bit slow. We drank a lot of Bourbon and didn't stretch properly before wedding dancing. Had to get up since there was brunch to be had. Pro Tip- Never Miss Post Wedding Brunch--EVER

Absolutely awesome weekend. Our travel struggles were nil and the love made everything worthwhile!

Shout out to the lovely bride and groom
MR. & MRS BULLOUGH


             BETTY                                                                                              LORD LADY SOCKS



 Bourbon is the most effective way to cure writers block that I've found thus far....










Friday, October 3, 2014

Its 3:50am...do you know where your blogger is?

Packing the car with strollers and luggage. First flight out of gulfport means up before the sun...before breakfast...before anything of reason.

Saturday, September 27, 2014

New Port,Rhode Island or a Brush with Death

I'm playing catch-up with my posts this trip was actually 3 or 4 weeks ago....

Let me start this off by saying I fly because there is no other way to get someplace faster or in our case cheaper.
Newspaper write up... sugar coated appropriately
Its a bit hard to see but the emergency crews are outside my window inspecting the underside of our broken plane

I was supposed to have been on a flight that got me into Providence at like 3:30 pm on Friday afternoon. Instead it was 11 pm and I was on the runway in Baltimore. Honestly, I was just quietly glad to be on the ground in one piece. I called my one of my friends in Baltimore to just in case I couldn't get on another flight (not a thrilling idea) and I needed a crash pad. I then called the hostel I was staying in to let them know I would be even later than expected. I then called the rental car agents who told me if got there by 1am I might have a chance at getting a car. Otherwise I'd be paying a $70 dollar cab fare into Newport from Providence.

Flying standby is never a guarantee. You never know if your flight will have empty seats, if it will be on time, if you'll make your connection, if... if....if... So what ends up happening for us is 25% of our trips go smooth as butter. We show up to a flight an hour early, we usually only check a bag if the kids are with us. We cruise thru security, wait for the standby list to clear. The flight has a short list of people on standby and we are near the top which doesn't matter because there are plenty of available seats. Occasionally we get upgraded. We board and make a smooth connection and arrive at our destination on time.

BUT 73% it goes like this. Arrive an hour early, cruise thru security. Sit anxiously watching the standby list. Refreshing it every 30 seconds to see if we have fallen lower or if we got bumped. There 40 people on the list and 10 seats available. The four of us are traveling and we are 11, 12, 13, and 14 on the list. Hoping some poor soul misses a connection or oversleeps so we can get to our connection on time. Nope, everyone shows up and the flight is oversold adding 6 more people to an already growing standby list. We miss the next flight out too and end up catching the third or fourth thus barely catching a connection to get to our destination at the latest possible hour. Which inevitably pisses off the people who were picking us up, and thereby creating a dreary precursor to our trip.


This is a 1% trip. I missed my first two flights out of New Orleans ended up with a 6 hour layover in Atlanta (which really isn't the worst thing See: One Flew South). I did catch the last flight to Providence, only for it to nearly be my last flight. I'm not so sure how close disaster we were but I will say that plane did loose hydraulic pressure in  the right engine which meant the pilots couldn't close the the doors over the landing gear. The flaps were also not functioning the way they should have been and when we came in to land the emergency crews were waiting for us on the runway. The door over the gear hit the ground and flaps stopped working altogether. I don't know the cause of the problem but I know that hydraulic pressure is extremely important in modern flight. I was just glad to be on the ground in one piece.

Now I bet you did the math....there's 1% missing.

1% of our flights go like this. We arrive 30 minutes before our flight, breeze thru empty security lines, walk right on to the flight because we've been cleared for seats in business class and get to board first. We are wined and dined sleep well. We make a seamless connection. Arrive slightly early so we can get our bearings and stretch our legs before we explore a new place.

Now then, like I had said. I did eventually get in to Providence and had another fiasco at the car rental booth. That's another post altogether. I finally got a car and drove down to Newport. Checked into my little hostel and slept for and couple hours. I was in town to check out a boat for the New Orleans Maritime Heritage Foundation. Just a favor for some friends with the added bonus that it was in Newport. I might do a full write up on that but for now here's some pictures.








Monday, September 22, 2014

Back in the Grind

A lot of what you'll see post here will be related to sailing and boats in some form or fashion. This is my office today. Working on rebuilding a hydraulic steering system. Pretty glad to be in the engine room instead of fiberglassing or fairing. Its is much easier to deal with after we got in late last night and had minimal rest before starting the work week. Still haven't heard anything about the carseats which were sent to Atlanta instead of gulfport. Luckily the baggage attendent had quite a few laying around so we could get the girls home safely. Morale of the story, no one is safe from baggage woes not even frequent flyers.

Sunday, September 21, 2014

Leaving orlando florida

Had a great time at the 60th wedding anniversary of my grand parents. 60 years is a long time and represents so much. Needless to say the party was full of love.

Friday, September 19, 2014

Driving Ambitions Part One

Driving Ambitions

The most common problem writers struggle with is where to start. So in an effort to overcome that issue I have found that by determining the most basic incident brought on the topic of which is to be discussed. By basic I mean, the ultimate inciting incident. In this case it was a need. I had a need for a vehicle. I had been balking at the idea of purchasing a car for a very long time, nearly a decade. I had multiple reasons for this, past tickets, maintenance costs, fuel cost, and general frustration. Unfortunately, I had to come to terms with the fact that I was a parent whose children were fast approaching school age and I was no longer living in the urban infrastructure of the northeast. In New Orleans kids are either bused to school, which wasn't always garaunteed or they were driven by their parents or caretakers, which is far more likely to be my future. 

My family knew this, my wife knew this, I refused to believe it. I chose to avoid buying a car like the plague. I preferred the inexpensive carbon free lifestyle of biking to work and the store. I even thought I could get away with getting the child carrier and bike my kids to school that way. My family was not convinced of this plan and set about their own plan of acquiring a vehicle for me. I stubbornly accepted the offer on the condition that I could chose whatever vehicle that I liked. I gave myself a few parameters, V6 engine, manual transmission, less than 100,000 miles and 4 wheel drive if possible. I didn't care about the color or the company that made it but I definitely wanted a manual transmission, I believe it says something about a persons character. After a month or so and being disappointed on more than one occasion the family told me to "get a move on and pick something already".  Well fine, a few more hours of googling and I had found my chariot. I called the dealership to confirm that it met all of my criteria and it checked out good. A Nissan Xterra with the off-road package to include a 256 horsepower V6 engine, 6 speed manual transmission and two speed 4 wheel drive. Even less than 100,000 miles and under my budget. There was a catch though, of course, the truck was in Portland. Oregon. I lived in New Orleans. Louisiana.  3,017 Miles or 47 hours apart from each other.  

I asked my wife if this was crazy. I have to do that regularly, ask her if I'm crazy, to make sure, you know, that I'm not...well, crazy. The conversation went like this:
"Honey, I found a car." 
     "Great, when can you get it?"
"Well, next week maybe."
     "Why so long?"
"It requires some planning."
     "What's not being said here"
"It's in Oregon, I'd have to drive it home it could take, maybe 5 days, if I'm slow, less if we drive in shifts, is that crazy?"
-----long pause----
     "Well it's not the easiest way about things and definitely not the most absurd thing you've said this week, lets figure it out"
---short pause---
"Okay, not crazy"
     "not overly crazy"
"Good enough for me, let's go to Portland!"

A few hours later, we had come up with a plan. I would have to fly out on Sunday because the deposit I had placed on the truck was only good until Tuesday. I had to make some money during the week which meant I needed to be home in the same week and my wife's birthday was friday so we needed to be home by then. Then the curveball came in we originally thought that she could come with me but a lack of available baby sitters and family members meant that I would have to do the trip solo. There was no way I could call anyone on a friday night/ early saturday morning and ask them to meet me in Portland on sunday morning. Only to drive back to New Orleans just for them to have to fly home from where ever they started. This is the sort ridiculous life the standby traveler leads. It seems to be exclusive to us, Hillary Clinton and Navy Seals. I would make 6,000+ miles by air and land in under a week. Seriously. This was happening.

Marriage is hard. So this trip came a either a good time or a less than desirable time depending on how you look at things. My wife and I had already been "at odds" we'll say to avoid the gruesome details of married life. She felt as though a road trip would give me some time to clear my head, which I tend to believe is probably code for "see things her way". I felt as though it was taking me away from her when we needed to be together the most, even though being in the same room was at times unbearable. I was exactly the opposite of thrilled to be away from her, especially during her birthday week. However I can't deny the minute I saw the idea start to form, I was chomping at the bit for a much need dose of exploration. Travel is my oxygen.  I thrive on the chaos and uncertainty of it all. Its been a part of me since I was a child. I sit and stare at maps for hours lost in the names of unknown places. I am that guy.

Sunday morning we left the house at 430 am. I had my ditch bag or otherwise known as my A-bag, terms I carry on from sailing and a former life in the military. The contents of which were as follows
-2 pairs of boxers
-2 pairs of socks
-2 t-shirts
-2 pairs of shorts
-1 pair of sweat pants
-1 undershirt
- toothbrush
- hairbrush
-sound canceling head phones ( a new addition, seriously if you fly a lot, this is a lifesaver)
-laptop and charger
-printed directions
-id, passport and checkbook
-sunglasses
-a book from a friend

I also took a sleeping bag

I must take a moment to talk about an absolutely phenomenal experience. During my flight to Minnesota, where i had a layover, I happened to look out the window. The sky was very dark but with the new dawn colors starting to spread upward from the horizon. Still dark enough to clearly see the stars yet the sun was halfway up in the cloudless sky. I looked down at the ground which was also still very dark and similarly lightening in shades of green and brown creeping from the horizon. Suddenly, almost terrifyingly I noticed that what I thought was ground was in fact twinkling back at me and I experienced a long moment of confusion. The sky fully mimicked by the ground. It took a second ot register that the sun was gently reflecting on the multitudes of rivers, lakes, windows and various other shining objects. All at just the right angle to look marvelously like the sky above me. Honestly it was a beautiful moment. I wish I could have taken a picture. My words do not give it justice. Things like that will renew your faith in God.



Oregon
I landed in Portland just after 1pm and caught at cab to the dealership. Eighteen minutes, nearly fifty dollars. Easily the most expensive cab ride ever. I met up with my wonderfully enthusiastic sales representative Krista M. She's a peach and a pistol. Word to the wise people,  women who work in a field that is  generally accepted to be a man's are probably better and smarter than their male counter parts. Treat them as such. Or you will get rolled. I learned this a long time ago. So we followed what I presumed to be semi-customary/obligatory haggling and about 5 hours later I had the keys and was poor again. The process of course was not without a technical glitches but that is the world we live in now and eventually cash was handed over. Honestly, Krista and her team made the day pleasant when it could have been a nightmare. I am grateful for that. I could have just as easily gotten back on the plane and flown home if things went pear shaped but they accomodated me wonderfully.



I have to add that I showed up to the dealership with the clothes I was wearing, my ditch bag, and my sleeping bag. I imagine the employees will be talking about it for weeks. "Remember that guy who flew in, bought a truck and drove it back to New Orleans....he was crazy." My wife said I wasn't, remember that. 

First order of business, establish a working knowledge of the newly acquired asset. The truck. It needed gas, great so it begins. 

-I'm just going to stop the questions from coming right here. I paid a lot of money for a lot of gas. At an estimated 21 mpg on the highway the price of fuel ranged thru the trip from $4.87 to $3.37 per gallon. 3,017 miles... you do the math if you care so much, I gave up after the first $65 tank.-

I also needed a way to play my music thru the speakers which meant I needed a second stop. Lastly I needed food and drinks. I planned to drive until I got to the California state line in the first night so I didn't want unnessary stops. This took about an hour or so plus a quick, get my bearings tour ( aka "crap I missed my exit") of downtown Portland. Portland is a really interesting city. I'd like to have been able to hang around and really dig into it but it was getting late and I had a schedule. The road called. I headed south on I-5. I wish it had been earlier, the light that I had from passing cars and the moon suggested a beautiful landscape with tall trees and mountains, things I rarely see in the short flat deep south. I passed thru tiny rural towns one by one in the night.  Just past Crescent City I crossed the state line at 2am, two hours shy of having been awake for 24 hours straight. I pulled over into a rest stop and stretched out my sleeping bag. Wearily I searched for a pillow and only found the airline blanket I had absconded on my first flight. The back of the truck was hard plastic but I did my best to sleep. Engine off, windows cracked the smell of the warm forest and foliage. I passed out



Northern California
5:20 am: Startled awake to a blaring car horn, a stream of foul words issued from my extremely bitter subconscious.WHO the F**** is blowing their horn? Don't they know I am/was in here sleeping. You soul less schmuck!  Oh wait, I rolled over on the keys and set off the alarm on the truck. Damn it, how do I make this stop? I fumbled in the early predawn light to turn off the alarm which had an immense echoing sound, a very impressive horn. Swung the door open and staggered out on to shaky legs. Having forgotten my pillow I slept fairly contorted and was now paying a brutal price. Checking my surroundings I had parked next to a VW hatchback in the night. In the window I could very clearly see a 20 something woman glaring at me. Guess I woke her up. Sorry I tried to mimick. Inconsolable.  It looked like we had been parked in to a corner of the lot by two huge logging trucks whose drivers I had also woken up. They were staggering around the cabs just as I was heading to the bath room. Coming back to the truck I was able to really assess my surrounding. The fog was lifting a bit and I realized I was in a crook of sorts surrounded by steep hills on all sides with the rest stop nestled in the center. Big green odiferous pines trees standing tall with their light brown needle covering the ground. The air was fresh and crisp as I went to sit in the truck and drink the cold coffee leftover from the drive in. I briefly conversed with the couple in the hatchback as we waited for the logging trucks to pull out. They had come from somewhere obscure down in the south and were heading to Portland for a fair. They had opted to sleep in the car same as me and were generally pleasant west coasters. I packed up my very few things and made a mental note to buy a pillow before I stopped for the next night. Waved good by and headed out the way I came and turned south.


To be continued (its quite a long story actually...)










Sunday, December 29, 2013

The Holiday Season

I have been considering creating the blog for a while but to be honest I just didn't know if I was able to produce enough content. Well the holiday travel season gave me enough to write about to keep me going for the next few months. In the last ten days I have flown 8 times, traveling from New Orleans (home) to Baltimore and to Savannah. The trip to Baltimore was to see my parents and take our daughters to see grandma and grandpa. This was a single parent trip which is a topic I'll address thoroughly in this blog.  The trip to Savannah was with my wife and kids which is yet another topic I'll address, family travel. Commonly one of us is shuttling the girls somewhere and as frequently flying parents with small children (1 year old and 3 year old) we have developed some brilliant tried and true tricks to make family air travel undeniably easier. 

I'll get into posting pictures and tips later in the next few days.

Right now however I have to pack for our adults only trip to Paris! 


Welcome to Mr. Standby!
Mr. Standby is a new voice in the ethereal sea of blogs. 
Designed to Inspire you, Empower you, and Assist you. 
Come over, have a seat and refresh your imagination.


     Air Travel it seems is predominantly made up of a few groups of people. First class, the wealthy who require a curtain and a hot towel, they are unashamed of the high price they are willing to pay for those big cushy seats in the forward cabin of the plane. Business class, charge those drinks to the "per diem" account. They could have upgraded to First class but this trip is on the company, no need to shell out those extra dollars. Coach Class, just happy to be on the plane, honeymooners, new grandparents, bachelor parties, college bound, a pleasant mix of everyone else. Sure the drinks aren't big and the seats aren't luxurious, but Coach class beats sitting on the couch any day, period. 

Now that would seem to be it for the social structure of Air Travel, but there are subgroups that exist. Yes, Mr. Standby and his very lucky fellow Standby fliers. 

Mr. Standby enjoys the pleasure of sitting in Coach, in Business, and even in First class. Mr. Standby goes everywhere the plane goes, and does it at a fraction of the cost and usually for free. Mr. Standby is also not alone. There are almost always others in the subset enjoying the same luck as him.  Come along as he relates his adventures in words, photos and videos.